Drs Visit two thumbs up

I have to say I walked into the drs ofc expecting one things which was proof the girls are older than whats on paper, but I gotta tell ya, I got so much more! I will pass along some info later, share the experience, and hope those that are surfing the blog will take the suggestions and use them while in the process.

suggestion number 1  ETS

I was so excited about my visit, I noticed there were some crazy crazy errors made, so I will attempt to take my time and rewrite my first suggestion.  

• look for an international adoption MD that is local.  Don't do the fax in ur referral information and wait for a response.  This is a process I learned that starts well before you even get your referral.  You should be in contact with a IAD (international Adoption Dr) for the sake of conversations.  May cost you, or it may not, but for the price it is money well spent.  Through these consultations, you will learn a whole lot.  If I had a do over I would have met with her once I got my referrals

• Look for a person that has experience in ID, not someone who sees a few kids after they are home as their regular pediatrician. Ask how active the Dr is in International affairs.  Do they attend conferences, are they on an international adoption panel.  Most of these questions can be done via email.  Case and point: El shaday has had two ear infections since she has been home, the last one was really really bad and resulted in a hole in her ear drum from the infection, the dr treated it as an isolated case, even though I explained the year I waited for her to come home, I would always see her in pics w/a runny nose and when I visited her in ET, her nose was full of mucus and it was runny.  I asked if I could be referred to a ENT(ear nose and throat dr) and was told not at this time, there is no reason to go, there was no regard to the fact that we don't know her history, and in fact if these ear infections has caused some damage.  One visit to the IDA and she was referred to a ENT.

• Not to beat up on a family dr that has been passed down the family tree or a referred by a friend, but I really liked their first dr, however, he was not a perfect fit for our situation right now.

• I have learned that in NJ, doing a age change, especially if you are making a child under 5 older, is a bit more involved, as oppose to an older child, really don't know the reason, but more exams are required.  Shaddi had to do a psychological exam.  

• I learned that when our kids come home and they dump on all this weight, w/older children is a thing that is never good!  As a result my oldest has developed this extended belly she never had prior to coming to America.  Reason:  w/all the weight gain, it has made the intestines stick out b/c of this, must prevent a curve from developing in the spine, and must ensure that there is no early signs of puberty going on.  The body is telling the body b/c of the weight gain to grown and b/c of this hormones are moving all over the place, very early and may need to be stopped.  So Helina has to have an abdominal unltrasound, and bone scan
  

• Shaddi balance is off, very clumsy, and eats like she is a 2 year old, very messy, when I brought this up to their first dr, he told me not to worry, she was use to eating w/her hands in ET, and she will grow out of it, well Helina was use to eating w/her hands also, but no way does she make such a mess like El Shaday, well, b/c of Shaddi not being able to walk a straight line, and hope on one foot w/o falling over, they want to rule out that there are any ear infections going on that may be still present and causing this balance problem and poor coordination.

well the list goes on and on....bottom line reach out to someone that knows and you feel they are aware of the things that come along w/international adoption as it pertains to health issues.

onto step number two......exams, and a motion made to the court

here is where the facts will conclude that both my girls are older than what is on paper, they will also change their names at this time, and the most exciting part is that they will both be in their right grade!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ok ok ok...now that is progress

Finally got a call back from the attorney, who states she needs to do research but she thinks getting a age change is some type of immigration violation.....hmmmmm, now sure what she meant by that.

but.............I got in touch with an International Adoption Dr. who just did a family in my area who adopted from ET!!!!!! yes!!!!

Apt next Thursday!!!!

Will Keep u guys posted

wow, seems like I have been away frm this blog for such a long time......

lets see whats going on in Bennett Land

I will add pics later

Well the girls got their library cards, and were very excited of all the unknown ventures the local library has to offer

They graduated from ear ring post to little hoops! Shaddi loves her new ear rings but Helina wld just do without ear rings if she had any say in the matter....lol

School is working out well for the girls.

Shaddi has done so well that she was moved a grade in preK

I am working on re-adoption, names changes, and birthdate corrections, and boy I tell ya, if your medical dr is not on board you can just hang it up, but I won't stop, can't stop, and its my duty to fight for whats right. A simple bone scan seem to have them(dr) dragging their feet on ordering it. But we will see a/b that. I have an apt next week with them, not to mention being the school moved shaddi up, they want proof of her age, and all I have are the papers that I cam home with from ET that has her aged almost 2yrs incorrectly in my opinion.

so for the next person I will keep a running log of my progress on getting the her age changed. I think if u have ur drs support its not a hard thing to do, even w/o the dr support its not hard, but it makes it so much easier if the dr just says, yes, lets order the bone, scan, get some dental records, then make a informed, professional decision to change the age. but no........they are very very conservative in their approach!

so round 1: I have located a international adoption dr in my area, placed a phone call to an international lawyer.......waiting on call backs.

hmmm, what else is happening??

im thinking!!!! BRB

School Pics

sisters to the end!!!!!!!
One of my favorite post!!!!!
Boy was she nervous!
hmmmm! she is never nervous  Shaddi can just jump right in!!!!! the little girl with the beads(white beads) cried and cried the entire first day and second day of school(poor baby) The security guard at school told me that El Shaday said, please don't cry, you will be ok, I will be your friends and help you!!!!!!!! You don't have to cry ur mommy loves you and will be back to get you."  The guard said she almost started crying when she heard her telling this little girl that!  when I got to the class to pick El Shaday up the girl in the white beads took my hand and wld not let it go, she had he her book bag on and when I said, Sweetie you have to stay here, she said no I am going with you!!!!!!!! awww!!!!!! so sad for her but so happy my daughter is not going through that horrible transition period!!!!!!!
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For both my girls!

I will follow up this post with pics and a update!!!!!!

so excited and can't wait to see them in their cute little uniforms!!!!!

The first two days of school are over, the girls enjoyed it and had a great time!  I picked them up from school and they barely took a breath while telling me about their day.  I like both their teachers!!!!!!!!

They were so cute getting ready for school on the first day, although they were nervous, and excited all at the same time.  

El Shaday is having a really good time in her class and there may be a chance she will get moved up to the PK4 class or even grade K, based on them testing her!!!!!!!! yay!!!!!!!! Teacher told me on Friday, she much to advance to remain in her class!  

Helina likes her teacher and she is raising her hand in class to answer questions during reading time.  Yes!!!!!! a big accomplishment from last year, where she only spoke in a whisper of a voice.

Helina told me they read a story, and the teacher asked who was the mom in the story, Helina raised her hand and pointed to who was the mom in the story, the teacher said well how do u know, Helina said b/c she is bigger!!!!!!!!  I know sound so small......... but just for her to take the leap and answer a question made my heart sing with joy! she is so shy in school, but so "Helina" at home!

I just love these girls so much!!!!